Dear Tanay,

You are FIVE years old today!! I don’t know if you realise this, but, this is HUGE! I have been trying to digest this for the past week or so and seriously, I am yet to come to terms with it. I cannot believe it! I mean.. when did you get so big?! Wasn’t it just yesterday that you were my cute little two and a half year screaming out his A to Z of dinosaurs?! And now you are this handsome little boy who, when Shubham is away, tells me that he is the man of the house and will take care of me! The only thing that hasn’t changed is your crazy hair, but then again, let’s face it, that’s never going to change…EVER!

March 19, 2010 06:21 am, Happy Birthday Tanay!

So, a VERY VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my Minju! (yeah… you are probably going to hate me for blurting out this name on the internet. So, sorry in advance.) You are the most wonderful son a mother could ask for. You give me so much of joy every single day that I cannot even put it in words. Especially this past year… you have amazed me with your understanding and love. This year has been hard for all of us. But mostly for you. On one hand you were delighted to have Dhruv as your baby brother, but on the other, you were suddenly forced to take the back seat. I cannot even imagine how difficult that must have been for you. From being the center of attention to having to share the spotlight. But I have to admit… you did awesome!! I seriously did not expect you to handle the situation with so much maturity. From the time, i dropped you off at Aditi Aunty’s house while we went on to the hospital.. to this day… you amaze me and I have come to respect you for that.

I also owe you an apology. In the last few months, I realise that we haven’t really gotten to spend much time together. You know.. some good ol’e one-on-one fun time. And I feel terrible about that. I miss our time together and I promise that I am going to fix that.

You are learning so many new things. There’s karate… and soccer … and your drumming! You have declared on more than one occasion that, when you grow up you want to be a Jazz Drummer! Of course there was the time when you announced one morning, over a cup of milk, that your ambition was to become a vampire and then you proceeded to gulp down the milk, pretending that it was blood! ugh..SHUDDER! You have no idea how happy & relieved I am that you have given up on that. (Atleast that’s what I think.)

I love watching you get excited when you learn new stuff. It makes me realise how much you are growing. I only wish I could protect you from the disappointments that come alongwith it. Just the other day, you walked out of your karate class, head hung low because you did not get a magic marble (given for good work).

“Mommy…did I do a good job???

Mommy.. are you happy with me?? ”

“Yes..Tanay.. I am very happy… you did awesome!”

“But then…why did I not get a magic marble?”

I cannot get that look on your face out of my mind. I just wanted to bury you in my arms and protect you from all this. I didn’t want you to go through this… not at this age! Hell! when I was five, I probably didn’t even know what karate was! You are my baby and I cannot bear to see pain on your face….especially the kind that cannot be fixed with Tylenol.

I know this post has gotten completely out of hand. Hands down the most sappiest one I have ever written. But since I am on a roll, let me just say one more thing. I love you and I am insanely proud of you! I am glad that you are my son!

Have a Rocking birthday!! mmmwaaah!

Love

Mommy

I just spent the last two days working on a post which was all about how tough motherhood is. How I had a really hard time with Tanay and how this time I wanted it all to be different. It turned out to be a pretty longish post too. Then just as I was previewing it, something made me stop. I turned around to see Tanay sleeping next to me in my bed and Dhruv asleep in his crib. And I just hit the delete button. Everything was perfect. All the hardships… all the pain… all the stress just melted right out of that post.

My boys are here with me. Happy & healthy. Nothing else matters.

Being a mother has undoubtedly been the most difficult job I have ever done in my life. The stakes just got doubled. Wish me luck!

As a kid, my mom always told me to never lie to her. She said that if I ever did, she would always find out. Her eyes would be following me everywhere I went. This kinda stuck with me through my growing years. So much so that the other day, I found myself sounding very much like my mother…. saying something similar to Tanay.

I had picked up a box of the mini Oreo cakesters from Wegmans. Tanay loves them and I usually give him a couple in his lunch box. He knows, he is not allowed more than that and definitely not without checking with me first. Yesterday, I was upstairs in my room feeding Dhruv. Tanay was downstairs with my in-laws. His grandma asked him what he would like to have for a snack. He pulls a chair, climbs up, gets his hands on a couple of packets of the sinful cakesters, tears open the packs with his scissors and gobbles them all up. Not only that, he threw the packs in the trash, washed up and even wiped his face dry. Just look at the four year old’s scheming mind. Trying to bury all traces of the crime before the mother walks in. 

How do I know all this? Of course, my MIL told me. So, later that day at dinner time, I was being a little “non- smiley”.

Tanay: Why are “some people” being so mad?!

Me: That’s because “some people” are not being very honest with their mother these days.

Tanay: You mean me?!!

Me: You tell me.. Just remember that your mother has super powers! She knows everything that you do, even if she is not in the room. 

Tanay: huh?!

Me: I have eyes everywhere… in the back of my head… on the sides…everywhere… so you watch out!

By now… he had this glazed look in his eyes, which he usually gets when he is imagining something.

Tanay: I know!! Mommy.. Your are an ALIEN!!

On the way to school the other day:

Tanay: ” Dhruv is a crazy hair guy. Actually, he is a baby porcupine!”

Here’s why….

Little does he know that his own hair is not very different from this. I am seeing myself struggling with two porcupines in the coming future. I am exhausted just thinking about it.

This morning, Shubham & I were at the kitchen table enjoying our morning cup of ginger tea, while Tanay was busy conducting a fight between Batman & Mickey Mouse. Suddenly…

Tanay: Poo Poo…. Poo Poo…!!!!

Shubham: You go…. I did it yesterday…

Me: No way! You have been away all week…. I am not getting up.

Shubham: Why can’t I read my paper in peace?!

Me: Because that’s why! (which in case you did not know is Tanay’s answer to everything and which we very conveniently use. Face it… it’s an excellent reason!)

Tanay (shaking his head and looking rather exasperated): I don’t need any of you!!! I can go by myself!

And so we spent the next two minutes in peace, until Tanay started running all around the house like a li’l streaker and all hell broke loose!

Breakfast time this morning.

Me: Tanay, where are you going?! Please sit in your chair and finish your breakfast.

Tanay (as he goes and lies down on the couch): I need a break!

Me: What??! It’s not even been an hour since you woke up….. and you already need a break??!

Tanay: Yeah…. I need a break from you.

Seriously??!!….. how bad am I getting to be? And no, this is not a question to any of you reading this. Coz, in reality, I don’t want to know.

It’s Christmas eve. I couldn’t be more excited! I have always celebrated Christmas. I am from Bombay and there everyone shares in the joys of all religions, irrespective of who you are. My mom had a real christmas tree out in the balcony and my earliest memory of a present is a shiny blue pencil box hanging by a thread on it. My brother and I went to a Catholic school and Christmas was just as special as Diwali or Holi.

And now I have Tanay to share it with, which makes it even more special. He is so excited. He has mailed out his list to Santa via the fireplace. We plan on making cookies today for his snack when he stops by. But that’s not all. Our very good friends will be here tonight from California. So will Shubham’s cousin. I love having a full house on holidays. The more the merrier!!

Have a wonderful Christmas everyone! Here’s a special greeting from Tanay. Enjoy!

Not only is he obsessed with all the super heroes and bad guys in this universe, Tanay is slowly turning into one. Anybody know where I can get an extra large pack of patience?!

A few weeks ago, we attended a Math & Literacy night at Tanay’s school. I insisted that Shubham come along. After all he is the math & science guy between the two of us. More importantly, he has way more patience than I have when it comes to sitting with Tanay and going over letters and numbers. In fact, he is solely responsible for me getting through the finals of my Masters. Both of us have very different learning techniques. He is curious, wants to understand the fundamentals and actually enjoys learning. I, on the other hand, just want to get it over with. So…. there you go. 

At school, while Shubham & Tanay explored the different math games which the teachers had set up, a very scary feeling came over me. My baby was all grown up. Even more scary was that fact it was time to get a little serious. It was time to hit the books. I was raised to believe that education was the most important thing and I always knew that educating your child is one of your biggest responsibilities. I just didn’t know how scary it could be! I know what you are thinking….. a harmless Math night and Priya loses it. What can I say… it was like a wake up call. 

So, Tanay & I have started spending a few minutes every day pouring over pre-school workbooks. I say a few minutes, because that’s how long Tanay can sit in a place without having this irresistible urge to start drawing dinosaurs and super heroes (his latest). Of course it all just looks like scribbling to me. But I know there is a story behind every single scribble of his. Shubham’s explanation for his bizarre drawing skills is that his imagination runs so fast that his hand cannot keep up. That’s another thing. Shubham is way more creative than I am and hence sees the creative streaks in our boy better than I ever could. So as you can see, I have some learning to do of my own. I have a feeling that it’s going to be a fun journey.

On a closing note, here is something I read in the latest edition of the Parenting Magazine:

“At age 4 a child is finally smarter than a pigeon, according to scientists at Keio University in Japan.”

Seriously??? What will these so called researchers come up with next??? If this is true then we have just a few months left before we get hit by a sudden bout of smartness.

Seven years of absolute joy and bliss. Shubham & I can hardly believe that it’s been that long. We were under the impression that the seven year itch starts when you complete seven years, but then a friend mentioned that, the itch in fact has already ended. Hmmm… I am confused. Anyways, I intend to rent the famous Marilyn Monroe movie this weekend and watch it with Shubham.

I know I have been slacking lately. OK, slacking a lot. What can I say… we have been busy…doing our own thing. Shubham has been bitten by the work out bug and has been devoting all his time to adding some muscle to his bones. And, just like every other thing that he takes up, he is very serious about it. Of course, I now have to answer his “How do I look?” every single day. You have no idea how tiring it can get. But I am happy that, at least this obsession of his is for his own good. So, while Shubham focuses on getting flatter abs, I promise to aim for the exact opposite. After all, balance needs to be maintained in this universe.

Tanay came up to us this morning and gave both of us a “Happy Anniversary” hug. We also got special anniversary-smiley-face stickers from him which we had to flaunt on our shirts. He actually wanted them on our faces, but I managed to talk him out of that. Don’t give me that look! One of the stickers was a huge alligator!